All I wanted to do was pull you from that frigid water and hold you close and know that my warmth would bring you back to me all okay and well. I was so weak though. My heart was aching, I was dreaming of you. Jack, I was wishing for you, but nothing...nothing at all happened. Nothing, except a great sadness of a death.

Love? Lust? ...where did it all go? Why did it go away and not take me along? Maybe you heard me, Jack, up in heaven as I lay in that boat trying to dream and making the effort to wish. Jack, now I know you are gone...but how am I supposed to move on? Still now...if I close my eyes...I can feel your soft touch that once lay a place on my heart...remember Jack? Remember that time we spent together when passion opened it's doors to us, and how it let us have a true love of our own? Remember how you lay on my chest afterwards and nothing at all was going on..but the feeling of happiness and satisfaction that our love making all went okay.

Why Jack? Why? Saying your name, still today even hurts me...How am I to bring myself to love anyone like I love you? Ohhh Jack...I wish you were here to bring all the answers to my tired, lonely heart! My heart aches from that cold sea...the one that claimed you...My first, real, true, and forever love....